For many women, the idea of body love is a foreign, unattainable concept that is for other women, not them. Whether it is the saggy boobs, the stretch marks, the extra {insert random number of pounds here}, the wrinkles on your face or the size of your thighs, the thought of loving our selves just as we are even seems ludicrous to some. You probably ask yourself questions like:
How can I love myself when I look like this?
How can I love myself when I’ve made so many mistakes?
How can I love myself when I can’t seem to get food and my weight under control.
How can I love myself when all I am bombarded with is societies standards of beauty and I don’t even come close?
How can I love myself?
And so, when I write about why you should love your body now or the importance of self-acceptance, I get a lot of questions. You want to know how to actually apply these sort of “woo-woo” concepts to your real life with your real body. So, today, I want to talk to you about real body love in real life.
Body Love
( for real women, in real life)
In real life, body love looks like standing in the mirror and admiring yourself. Sometimes, that means only focusing on that one single part you really do love (like maybe your collar bones that you recently found or your eyes, maybe even just your wrists). And sometimes, it means sitting in a pile of emotional mush on the floor wondering why it is so easy some days and so fucking hard on others.
In real life, body love looks like super self-care. Long, hot baths, luxurious lotions and potions. Painted nails, massages and pedicures. Plucked eye brows and waxed hoo hoos. And other days, it looks like grey roots and hang nails.
In real life, body love looks like fruits, vegetables, tons of water and plenty of protein. And it also looks like cheeseburgers, french fries and pizza. Add on some nutella, ice cream and potato chips for good measure.
In real life, body love looks like long walks through the woods, yoga, kitchen dance fests, playful cartwheels and hula hoops. And some days, it looks like long days on a cozy sofa with blankies and slippers.
In real life, body love looks like quiet time, meditation and good books. It looks like deep conversations with friends and peace of mind. And sometimes, it looks like an emotional basket case with tears and snot pouring down her face.
In real life, body love looks like love. And it also looks like loathing and hate.
In real life, body love looks like all of these things. And everything in between.
Because, in real life, true body love is not perfect. It is compassionate and understanding of the human experience. It embraces the highs, the lows and everything in between. In real life, true body love loves what is, except when it doesn’t. In real life, body love looks like learning, growing, healing, laughing and crying.
True body love is a process, that happens in real life. With real human emotions.
And, so, my dearest, don’t worry if you haven’t figured out how to get it just right. Or if you haven’t figured out why some days you can feel peaceful and loving and others days, not so much.
You are where you need to be, right now, and always.
Body love isn’t just for those girls who seem perfect on the outside, or who seem to have it all together, or who seem to be able to “do it” in spite of their circumstances.
True body love is for you and me, too.
True body love is a practice.
If you want to talk about what body love is for you with real women who are living real lives (including me), join the conversation.
